I have received many comments and private messages from people who have lost loved ones. Some simply want to let me know that they can relate to what I’m feeling. It is so beautiful to me, how connected we are to those who have also grieved deeply. I have really treasured and appreciated these messages. Many friends have shared with me things which helped them to process their own grief – meditation, prayer, a lighter schedule, a busier schedule, exercise, journaling, simply the passage of time…there does not seem to be a magic formula. Yesterday a friend wrote to me that it helped her to make a playlist of music that reminded her of her daughter who passed. She would listen, and allow herself to become immersed in the music and fully feel the pain of it. She listened to it a lot in the beginning, and then gradually she needed to “go there” less and less. I could relate. We played a beautiful song at my dad’s funeral, and for a couple of weeks after that, all I could listen to when I was alone in my car was that song – over and over and over. To listen to any other music felt uncomfortable. Another friend mentioned yesterday being caught off guard with emotion after having heard a particular song. Isn’t music amazing? It really has the power to connect us to our emotions and to each other, to take us back to a time or place, to lift us up or to allow us to grieve. So today, day 4, I am thankful for music.
I thought about what song I wanted to link here, and I decided to go the joyful route and stop making you all cry all the time. Every morning I wake the girls for school with a gentle brush of the cheek or a quick snuggle before getting into the shower. If they have not emerged from their beds by the time I get out of the shower, I play this song…LOUDLY, because it is joyful and it makes me want to dance. Sometimes they groan, and sometimes they shimmy into the bathroom and grab a microphone (aka hairbrush).
I was tickled to google the song on YouTube and be reminded of this video that went around Facebook a couple of years ago. So, I am ALSO thankful for this dancing dude – talk about JOYFUL and also not giving any EFFs. Bonus points for the “Say Anything” speaker situation. This makes me smile.
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